Rethinking the gym

Life for me used to be a lot simpler when it came to fitness. You threw on a pair of gym shorts, a randomly grabbed t-shirt, and out the door you ran in so-so kicks you didn’t think to much about. I put as much thought into what I was wearing as I put into the brand of toothpaste I bought. But the more and more I’ve become in-gay-tiated into gay life, I’m learning fitness isn’t as simple as brush and go.

Going to the gym isn’t just about going to the gym to lose weight or pack on muscle. It’s more like a sweaty watering hole of animals, all coming together to examine one another as they meander around the pool of free weights and barbells. Aspects of your dress and character are examined, and if not truly examined at least noticed more then you might realize.

It’s silly and rather ridiculous. Vanity in a new form I didn’t really understand. Why should I care what people think about what I look like at the gym? Will they really care if my hair is messy, or if my shirt is an X too big? I’m there to sweat it out not get it on. Right? Yes and no.

The gym isn’t just a gym. The gym can be as much a meeting place to a gay man as a bar can be in West Hollywood on a Friday night. I’ve been asked out on dates sitting on a bench press about as often as I’ve been asked out while sitting on a bar stool. I’ve had job opportunities pop up on a treadmill. I even met my gay best friend while stretching on a floor mat. Clearly, the gym is a free for all of networking possibilities.

Nowadays I wouldn’t be caught dead in that old ratty t-shirt with some brand logo I don’t recognize. I wouldn’t dare to wear those shorts that hang loose and too far below the knee. I wouldn’t deign to lace up shoes that look practically orthopedic. The clothes we wear are meant to accentuate our best assets, hug every curve in just the right place, and be clean and well fitted to the frames we are all working hard to achieve or just maintain. Some of us have a carefree knack in knowing what to wear. While newbies to this underlying gym attitude feel like they have to work for it as hard as they work to squat an extra 10 lbs.

I think the hardest part is understanding there is a fine line between being practical in what you wear, and just be practically over the top. At the end of the day it still is a gym. Everyone that goes there isn’t gay, and as much as I’d like to dream that every sexy straight man I see there has a secret love of Barbara Streisand, that’s unrealistic.

Dress classically sexy and not cheaply sexual. Meaning, just because you have a nice rear end doesn’t mean your end should be literally hanging out of your shorts. If you look at yourself in the mirror and you wonder what corner of the boulevard you should be working tonight, change.

For me becoming a more conscious gym dresser had a positive side effect. I took the gym more seriously then I did before. Knowing that someone out there might be watching caused me to push harder, lift more, run faster. Consequently the fitter I became the more confidant I walked and stood. I was character building in the gym and not even realizing it. Once I flipped that switch in my head and really owned that part of being a gay man I changed for the better. I can’t wait for my workout tomorrow, but what will I wear?!